Funny Stories Not Paying Attention Getting Kids Attention

"If y'all've heard this story before, don't finish me, considering I'd like to hear it once more." Groucho Marx

On Wisdom & Humor: Short Stories to Make Yous Think & Smile…

Stories are a very powerful style to communicate and convey messages. With a story, y'all tin cut through the need for excess circumlocution in a presentation, and in ane fell dive, evangelize a pithy or funny cannonball to a captive audience. All of us love to hear stories considering nosotros can accept the moral of the story shared, make it our ain, and retell it with added nuances or modified words. The best stories often linger in our minds and demand that we retell them; their message frequently incisive, strong, true. I find that good stories don't get tired… Nosotros can read or hear them over and over once again, and they concur our attending, convey their wisdom or humor as if for the first time…

The Wise Woman's Rock
A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious rock in a stream. The next day she met some other traveler who was hungry, and the wise adult female opened her handbag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation. The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the rock was worth plenty to give him security for a lifetime. Just a few days after he came back to return the rock to the wise woman.

"I've been thinking," he said, "I know how valuable the stone is, only I give it dorsum in the hope that you can requite me something even more precious. Give me what you take within you that enabled you lot to give me something more precious. Requite me what you have within yous that enabled you to give me the stone.
Author Unknown

Lady Gets on a Motorcoach
A lady gets on a public charabanc. Without saying a word, she gestures to the bus driver past sticking her thumb on her olfactory organ and waving her fingers at the commuter.
The commuter acknowledges the lady, turns to her and uses both hands in the aforementioned type of gesture and waves all his fingers at her.
The woman holds her right arm out at the driver and chops at it a few times with her left hand.
Then the commuter puts his left hand on his correct bicep and jerks his right arm up in a fist at her.
The adult female then cups both of her hands under her breasts and lifts gently. So the driver places both of his easily at his crotch and gently lifts up.
Then the woman frowns, runs a finger upwards between her derriere, and gets off the passenger vehicle.
There is some other woman sitting in the forepart row of the bus who witnessed the whole exchange.
She speaks upwardly, "That was the most icky thing I have always seen on a public jitney! What the
hell were you doing?"
"Listen lady," states the gruff bus commuter, "the lady that got on the coach before was a deafened-mute.
She asked me if the bus went to 5th Street. I said no, nosotros go to 10th Street. She asked if we make many stops. I told her that this was the express. She asked if we go by the dairy, and I told her we go by the ballpark. She said "Shit, I'm on the wrong motorbus!" and got off."

"I like a adept story well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself." Mark Twain

On Wisdom & Humor: Short Stories to Make You Call up & Smile… Storytime

Stories transport us to another time while education u.s. profound lessons about life. For this post, I've decided to share several stories with you. These are stories that will make usa think and/or make us smile. Some of them fabricated me express joy out loud… merely so again, it depends on how much it takes to tickle your funny bone. Like Marking Twain, most of us love a expert story; long or short. We love funny stories and jokes considering they elevator our spirits and give united states of america something to mull over. Stories can bring disparate groups of people together and give them a phonation to aid limited their joys and concerns. Because they leave united states with visual memories, stories are a dandy way to build connections and friendship with others…

Socks and Shoes
A piffling boy about 10 years old was continuing earlier a shoe store on the roadway, barefooted, peering through the window, and shivering with cold. A lady approached the boy and said, "My fiddling fellow, why are you looking and then earnestly in that window?" "I was asking God to give me a pair of shoes," was the boy's respond.
The lady took him past the mitt and went into the store and asked the clerk to get half a dozen pairs of socks for the boy. She then asked if he could requite her a basin of water and a towel. He chop-chop brought them to her. She took the little young man to the back office of the store and, removing her gloves, knelt downwards, washed his lilliputian feet, and dried them with a towel.
Past this time the clerk had returned with the socks. Placing a pair upon the boy'due south feet, she purchased him a pair of shoes. She tied upwards the remaining pairs of socks and gave them to him. She patted him on the caput and said, "No dubiety, my niggling fellow, you feel more comfortable now?"
Every bit she turned to get, the astonished lad defenseless her by the hand, and looking upwardly in her face up, with tears his eyes, answered the question with these words: "Are you God'south Married woman?"
Author Unknown

My Proper noun's Joe
There once was a farmer whose wife had died and left him with three beautiful teenage daughters. Every weekend, when they went out on dates, the farmer would stand at the door with his shotgun, making information technology clear to their dates he wanted no trouble from them.
Another Saturday night came around. About 7 p.g., in that location was a knock on the door. He answered and the fellow said, "How-do-you-do, my name'south Joe. I'm here for Flo. I'm taking her to the show. Is she set to go?" The farmer thought he was a clever boy and wished them a good time.
A few minutes afterward, some other knock was heard. A second boy appeared and said, "Hi, I'm Eddie. I'm here for Betty. I'm taking her for spaghetti. I hope she'due south ready." He thought that he must know Joe, only bade them off as well with his all-time wishes.
A few minutes after that, a 3rd knock was heard.
"Howdy, I'grand Chuck…" The farmer shot him.

Ticket Excuse
A human was driving home late 1 afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its scarlet lights on in his rear view mirror.
He thinks "I can outrun this guy," and so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing downwardly the highway — 60, seventy, 80, ninety miles an hour. Finally, equally his speedometer passes 100, the guy figures he can't outrun the cop and gives up. He pulls over to the curb.
The constabulary officeholder gets out of his cruiser and approaches the automobile. He leans downwardly and says "Listen mister, I've had a really lousy day, and I simply want to go home. Give me a good excuse and I'll let you go."
The man thought for a moment and said, "Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser in my rear view mirror, I idea y'all were that officer and you were trying to give her back to me!

"The unread story is not a story; it is trivial blackness marks on wood lurid. The reader, reading information technology, makes it live: a live thing, a story." Ursula K. LeGuin

On Wisdom & Humor: Short Stories to Make You Think & Grinning… Griots/Storytellers of Senegal

On Wisdom & Humor: Short Stories to Make Yous Remember & Smile… Stories under the Baobab tree..

In that location are all kinds of stories available to united states and they are oft told to suit the occasion at hand. The griots of Africa traveled effectually telling their stories and were paid to do so… Frequently the Griots told their stories under the baobab tree and when they passed abroad, some were cached by the tree. When we think back to our childhood, we call up the fables and fairy tales we enjoyed. Later, we learned parables and all sorts of other categories or genres that comprehend a wide range of stories. So, throughout our lifetime, we get exposed to curt stories, novellas, or novels roofing topics on Drama, Satire, Tragedy, Comedy (Tragicomedy), Humor, Action-hazard, Criminal offence & Detective, Horror, Mystery, Romance, Science fiction, Western, Inspirational, fiction, non-fiction and more… They carry us from birth to decease.

Two more aisles . . .
A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old daughter in her basket. Equally they passed the cookie section, the niggling girl asked for cookies and her mother told her no. The trivial girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the female parent said quietly, "Now Monica, we only have half of the aisles left to go through; don't exist upset. Information technology won't be long."
Soon they came to the candy aisle, and the little girl began to shout for candy. And when told she couldn't accept any, began to weep. The mother said, "There, there, Monica, don't cry–only two more aisles to become, then we'll be checking out."
When they got to the cheque-out stand up, the little girls immediately began to clamor for gum and outburst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering at that place'd be no glue purchased. The mother patiently said, "Monica, we'll be through this check out stand in five minutes and then you can go home and accept a nice nap."
The man followed them out to the parking lot and stopped the woman to compliment her. "I couldn't assistance noticing how patient you were with little Monica," he began. Whereupon the mother said, "I'chiliad Monica . . . my trivial girl's name is Tammy."  Author Unknown

A Boy and a Frog
One day, a boy was walking downwards a road when a frog called to him, "Boy, if you osculation me, I volition turn into a beautiful princess."
The boy picked up the frog, smiled at information technology, then placed the frog into his pocket. A few minutes after, the frog said, "Boy, if you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, and I will stay with you for a calendar week."
The boy took the frog from his pocket, smiled at it, then put it back into his pocket. A few minutes later, the frog said, "Boy, if yous kiss me and turn me dorsum into a beautiful princess, I will do ANYTHING you want!"
The boy took the frog from his pocket, smiled, and put it back. Finally, the frog cried, "Boy, what is the thing, I accept told you lot that I am a cute princess, and if you kiss me, I volition stay with you lot and practise Annihilation you want!"
The male child took the frog from his pocket and said, "Look, I am an engineering educatee, I take no time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool!"

More than below. 😉

"I don't want anyone reading my writing to think about fashion. I just want them to be in the story." Willa Sibert Cather

On Wisdom & Humor: Short Stories to Make Y'all Call back & Smiling… Dressed in stories…

Life Sentence
A woman awakes during the dark to find that her husband was not in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting in the kitchen with a loving cup of coffee, and he appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee.
What's the matter love?, she whispers as she steps into the room. Why are you sitting downwardly here this time of the night? The hubby looks up from his coffee, Do y'all call up xx years agone when we were dating, and yous were but xvi? he asks solemnly. Yep, I do she replies.
The husband paused, the words were not coming easily. Practise you remember when your male parent caught us in the back seat of my automobile making dearest?. Aye I call back, said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband connected. Do you lot remember when he shoved the double butt shotgun in my face up and said, "Either y'all marry my girl, or I'll send you to jail for xx years." Yes I remember that too. She whispered softly.
He wiped another tear from his cheek and said,
"I would exist getting out today"!
Author Unknown

A Diner Quickie
A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt and legs that won't quit came to his table and asked if he was set up to order, "What would you similar, sir?"
He looks at the carte and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, "A quickie."
The waitress turns and walks away in cloy. Later she regains her composure she returns and asks once again, "What would yous like, sir?"
Again the human being thoroughly checks her out and again answers, "A quickie, please."
This time her acrimony takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away. A human sitting at the next tabular array leans over and whispers, "Um, I think it's pronounced 'QUICHE.'"

Another reason why people love stories is that nosotros often can chronicle to what's being shared. We tin inject humor into a story, add a song like the griots do, or perform a piece for all to enjoy. Inevitably, what is conveyed is the humor and message of our story.

"What is life? An illusion, a shadow, a story, And the greatest proficient is little plenty: for all life is a dream, and dreams themselves are but dreams." Pedro Calderon de la Barca

On Wisdom & Humor: Brusk Stories to Brand Y'all Remember & Smile… A griot sings and shares…

Footprints
One dark a man had a dream. He dreamt he was walking forth the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene he noticed two sets of footprints on the sand — one belonging to him and the other to the Lord. When the last scene had flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints and he noticed only 1 ready. He also noticed that this happened during the lowest and saddest times of his life. This bothered him and he questioned the Lord. "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you would walk all the style with me, just I noticed that during the most troublesome times of my life there was merely ane set of footprints. I don't understand why, when I needed you most, yous deserted me."
The Lord replied, "My precious child, I dear you and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one gear up of footprints, those were the times when I carried y'all in my artillery."
Author Unknown

A Priest and Nun in Winter
A priest and a nun were lost in a snowstorm. After a while, they came upon a pocket-size cabin. Being wearied, they prepared to become to sleep. There was a stack of blankets in the corner and a sleeping purse on the floor but simply one bed. Being a admirer, the priest said, "Sister, you sleep on the bed. I'll slumber on the floor in the sleeping pocketbook."
Just every bit he got zipped upwards in the bag and was commencement to fall asleep, the nun said, "Begetter, I'yard cold." He unzipped the sleeping bag, got up, got a coating and put it on her.
Over again, he got into the sleeping bag, zipped it upwards and started to drift off to sleep when the nun once again said, "Father, I'm withal very cold." He unzipped the bag, got up over again, put some other coating on her and got into his sleeping bag once again.
But as his eyes airtight, she said, "Male parent, I'm sooooo cold." This fourth dimension, he remained there and said, "Sister, I have an idea. We're out here in the wilderness where no one will ever know what happened. Let'southward pretend we're married." The nun purred, "That's fine past me."
To which the priest yelled back, "Become upwards and get your own stupid blanket!"

We use stories to share ideas, information, advice, hope, humor, and many other lessons. Ultimately, our images and stories help united states equally much as they assist others…What do you think? What are your thoughts? Do you relish telling stories? How d0 you find the stories yous share? Do you take fond memories of storytime during your childhood?  What kind of stories appeal to y'all? Practise share! Cheers.

Positive Motivation Tip: Stories send us to some other time while teaching us profound lessons almost life. Find your story…

Photograph CREDITS/ATTRIBUTIONS: All Photos bookshelves, baobab tree, 30 stories, Griots Sambala, Niger Griot, via Wikipedia or Storytime by Jon K, via Flickr. Stories: Found on Yuni.com and lifesmith.com

Until Next Time…
Inquire. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet

coxgonded.blogspot.com

Source: https://mirthandmotivation.com/2011/10/24/on-wisdom-humor-short-stories-to-make-you-think-smile/

Share this post